'Win Blog: Peace out Columbia!

Today was the day, it finally arrived, the day I graduated from Columbia with my masters degree in exercise physiology. Four years in the making, one year of prerequisite work and testing for admission, and three years in the program. Wow. It has definitely been the most challenging thing I have ever pursued!

People often ask me how I do it, juggling motherhood, school work, internships, and research. My response is I don't know how to describe how I'm doing it, but I don't recommend it. The other component of that response is that it's not possible without a lot of help and support from friends and family! I literally would not have walked across that stage this morning without the help of countless people in our lives cheering us on, helping with the boys, being there when things got really tough, praying with us, and celebrating along with every milestone or particular goal or achievement.

This journey has been long and short at the same time. When I first re-entered a classroom after 15 years out of school, Judah had just turned one and Gabriel was three. Looking back I kind of wonder what I was thinking, going back to school with such young children. Practically speaking, I knew that I wanted to go back to work when the boys were both in school full time, and the process of earning a degree for a new career would essentially fill my resume gap as a stay at home mom and prepare me to re-enter the work force. Clearly, I did not anticipate exactly how difficult it would be to balance family life and school life, and eventually school-related work life as well. All of these challenges got me to where I am, they prepared me for the incredible job opportunities that I now have, but they came with great sacrifice.

If I had to do it over, I absolutely would, no question, but I would perhaps wait until Judah was a bit older before starting, so I wouldn't run myself and my family so ragged. But the positive side to the way I did it is that now, in 2017, it is over, we made it through to the other side and I start my new career in another month, with Gabriel and Judah in 1st and 3rd grades. That was the goal from the beginning. So it has been a long journey to this point, but at the same time, I look back and it feels like I was just starting the program and all of the sudden I'm finished, and it is over, and I am walking around the neighborhood in a blue robe! Today has been surreal, in that regard.

Today was a very full day. We all got ready this morning and headed to graduation around 9am. I bid the boys and fam farewell at the church steps (Cathedral of St. John the Divine) and headed to line up with my department. At first I didn't see anyone I knew, but then gradually more and more classmates showed up, we took selfies and lined up for the procession behind our department flag.

It's hard to describe the feelings I had when I walked up the grand stairs of the cathedral, and then into the vast cathedral space with soaring archways, marble for days, and endless rows of flags from many nations. I was thrilled to be there, but also kept welling up as I thought about everything, including the many sacrifices, that went into that moment. As the procession headed down the center aisle, a brass ensemble was playing "Problem" by Ariana Grande (which I found ironic because my study music is always instrumental rap and hip-hip!). I tried to take it all in and savor the moment, and I was scanning the crowds for the boys and Andy and my family. A big smile and wave at them just about made my heart explode, and I was thinking to myself "don't make the ugly cry face!". I lucked out in the procession and was seated in the second row from the front, where I enjoyed watching the rest of procession and listening to the brass ensemble belt out pop tunes. When the academic procession came through and the chair of the biobehavioral sciences department came through, we all clapped and cheered in solidarity, the punctuation on our time together for this cohort, through classes, labs and exams and research papers.

Admittedly, the speaking portion of the ceremony was rather long. The president and medal of honor recipient had good and inspiring things to say about the state of our current nation, world, and political climate, but I was also anxious to get across the stage. Since I was in the second row, I was with the first group to line up. We all had cards that we had to hand to the announcers with our names and phonetic spelling. Ash-lee Good-win. Really? I thought that was funny.

As they read my name, I proudly walked across the grand stage of the cathedral, and I heard someone call out my name which turns out was my advisor who was sitting with the faculty in what I think was the choir loft stage left. Anyway, I shook a bunch of people's hands I'd never met before, like the chancellor and other board members, then smiled for my professional photo (which surely I will not buy), and made my way down the stairs and back to me seat... and immediately started texting Steph and Andy to make sure the boys had been able to see me (they did!) and ask how they were holding up. All reports were good, and the Instagram posts Steph kept making were making me cry so I had to put down my phone.

At the conclusion, we all filed out to another brass ensemble tribute to pop (this time "Crazy in Love" by Beyonce and Jay-Z), which felt so much more celebratory than the traditional pomp and circumstance. To my surprise, as I walked back down the aisle I thought, wow that was really fun! (who thinks graduations are fun? don't people usually associate graduation with boring?) Speaking of fun(ny) as we all made our way down the staircase outside an open top tour bus was driving by and all these tourists were snapping pictures of all of us flooding out of the second largest cathedral in the world in our blue regalia!

We re-united after the ceremony and headed to campus for two receptions; the first was a general reception for all students that had champagne, chocolate-covered strawberries, and chocolate chip cookies! We all had our fair share of all of the aforementioned :). After the boys were sufficiently covered in chocolate, and the adults 2-3 cheers in, we headed to the next party. The second reception was just for students in my department, where we were treated to a nice lunch, and of course graduation cake, and everyone got to meet my advisor, who I have the utmost respect for and who has guided my path with great care. It was a really special moment to chat about graduation and everything that came before it with her.

We took a detour back to the bubbly and chocolate reception for a few more treats (!) and then headed to the main campus to take 10 million pictures. The boys were fantastic, even with ingesting their weight in sugar! We all went back to our apartment to get ready for a picnic lunch in Central Park (a nice alternative to the traditional brunch rush on all the surrounding restaurants which would have been tortuous to the boys, thus us). Andy and Gabriel went to grab the car, mom and Steph were on wine shop/grocery duty, and dad and Judah and I stayed home so I could change. We loaded up (funny side bar: Gabriel was sitting in the 3rd row seat, and Judah wanted to also but his car seat was buckled in the second row, so since it was a short trip we put both of them in the 3rd row, and I sat in Judah's car seat! Hilarious). We made our way to the North ball fields, spread out the good eats under the iconic shade tress and enjoyed some bubbly, food, and games. It was really lovely, and a very special time with my whole family.

The day wasn't winding down just yet. I had plans to meet up with my friend, colleague, and fellow student for a glass of wine to toast the occasion. I had asked if we could meet after the boys' bed time so I could tuck them in, but then Andy said I needed to go earlier because there was (he insinuated) a meet up with the other students from my program that was planned for earlier. So I kissed the boys good night and headed out with Dre. Little did I know Andy had planned a surprise graduation party at a friend's apartment who has an outdoor terrace overlooking the city, and Dre was an accomplice.

She said she had an errand to run, but then turned into my friend's building and I was all "hey I have a friend who lives here", and she said "oh I actually have a package I need to pick up from her" and I was like "how do you know Patricia?". Even the door man played along and said that Patricia wasn't home but had left the package outside her apartment door. I truly didn't catch on until I was inside her apartment staring at my friends and family with huge smiles on their faces. I think I used up all of my brain cells on the degree! What a great way to end such a celebratory day. I wouldn't say it was a long day, I would say it was a very full day. A day I will always remember. All glory to God for getting us through the last four years, I am excited to see where He will take us on this next journey. One last note ... when asked what their favorite part of the day was, Gabriel said the chocolate covered strawberries and cookies at the reception, and Judah said walking "all the way home" afterwards wearing my hat and tassel. :)